So, here's a play idea I have. It's about Molly, a college freshman, and her experiences there. My main concerns with this piece are: 1) It's a comedy. I normally write dramas, so this is a brand new branch for me. I want to know if it's funny. Not stupid, but funny. 2) This is what my theater professor called a "core dump," meaning I will go back through and edit and cut and make it better later. Mostly I want feedback on the whole, but if there's a line that's ridiculous or something please tell me. I want to make it better. 3) I want to know your opinions on the characters. Are they fun? Are they believable? Or are they boring and forced? Please let me know. Plays depend on the characters to exist, so please help me make good ones. 4) This is complete fiction. The "genesis" (as we call it in improv) was my apartment and the friends I've made and the experiences I've had, but it's expanded to become something new, original and not resembling the inspiration. I don't want anyone to draw the conclusion that I'm living with a floosy and a recluse: I'm not at all. Quite the opposite, actually. 5) Enjoy and comment. Those are the most important things. :D
LIGHTS BLACK
Scene One: An empty, perfectly clean apartment. There’s a sound of a key in a lock
and MOLLY enters. She carries luggage and a key ring. Where she gets inside she
takes a moment to look around, then pulls out her cell phone and dials a
number.
MOLLY: (On the phone) Hey, Karli? Annabelle, sorry. Is Becca there?—I’m
sorry, I’d love to talk to you, but she made me promise to call her the second
I walked in the door, and it’s already been twenty.—Alright, thanks, sweetie. (Beat.) Becca? Hey, I walked in less than
thirty seconds ago, so I’m pretty close—what’s it look like? Well… it looks
like an apartment.—I haven’t seen the bedroom yet, but I’m sure it looks like a
bedroom.—Alright, I’ll text you a picture.—It looks homey enough… I think I’ll
like it.—Oh, gosh, I don’t know… (To the
apartment) Is anyone here? (No
answer) Nope, it’s just me. They should show up soon.—A girl named Penelope
is sharing a room with me and Shanel is in the single room.—That’s all I know
about them.—What kind of question is that? I don’t know what I’m going to eat
for lunch today!—I’ll tell you that when I text you the picture of the
apartment.—Geez, girl, I’ve only been gone for a day!—I love you, too, but I’ve
got to unpack.—I’ll text you later, promise.—Alright, bye-bye. (She hangs up and hauls her bags to the
bedroom. Just a second after she exits there’s again the sound of a key in the
lock. After a few tries there’s a knock on the door. MOLLY answers it and PENNY
enters, carrying her bags.)
PENNY: Thank you! I’d better how
to use a key sometime or this could be a long semester. (Sets her bags down and sticks out her hand.) I’m Penny. Which
roommate are you?
MOLLY: (Shakes her hand.) Molly.
PENNY: So you’re my roomie. Want
the top or bottom bunk?
MOLLY: Oh… umm… I don’t really
care…
PENNY: Cool, ‘cause I want the
top.
MOLLY: Sounds good to me. I’ve
just started unpacking, if you want some company.
PENNY: Fabulous.
They exit, but continue
talking offstage while SHAY unlocks the door and enters. She dumps her bags on
the floor and sits on the couch, texting.
MOLLY: Where are you from, Penny?
PENNY: Chicago, born and raised.
You?
MOLLY: Etna, most recently.
PENNY: Etna? Where’s that?
MOLLY: Wyoming. It’s a village of
about two hundred people in the middle of the most beautiful nowhere in
America.
PENNY: (Not convinced) Sounds… exciting. Where before that?
MOLLY: Indiana, Boston, London,
and Pakistan.
PENNY: Holy cow, you’ve been everywhere!
(Beat) I think I’m going to go open a
window and get some airflow in here. It smells like vacancy. (She enters the living room and sees SHAY on
the couch.) Well hello! Are you our other roommate?
SHAY: I’d assume so. You’re
Penelope?
PENNY: Penny, please. Since we’re
going to be friends you’re going to have to call me that.
SHAY: (To herself) Freshmen. (To
PENNY) The first thing you have to learn is that being roommates does not
equal being friends. I thought that my freshman year, too, but it’s not how it
works.
PENNY: So, what year are you?
SHAY: I’m a junior. (MOLLY enters.) And I think it’s
important that you know that I don’t do well with nonsense, so try really hard
not to act like typical stupid freshmen, alright?
MOLLY: How did you know that we’re
both freshman?
SHAY: The “where are you from”
conversation, the expectation for instant friendship, and the fact that you’re
already unpacking. All sure signs.
MOLLY: Well, where are you from,
Shanel?
SHAY: Call me Shay; only my mom
calls me Shanel. I’m from Jamaica and I don’t want to go more into it. (She stands.) I’m going to my room to
skype my boyfriend. His name is Martin and he is from Spain and he is why I
will be anti-social this semester. Please don’t attempt to change my mind. I’m
going to marry this boy and so I don’t need new friends. It was nice to meet
you. Maybe we’ll talk again sometime. (Exits.)
PENNY and MOLLY look at each other,
bewildered.
MOLLY: (Attempting brightness) She seems… lovely.
PENNY: If you say so…
MOLLY: (After a beat) I’m going to run out and check the mail for that “change
of address” notice they said would be there. I’ll be right back.
PENNY: Alright. I’m going to go be
a freshman and keep unpacking.
She
exits. MOLLY takes a key off the table and leaves. After she leaves, PENNY
enters the living room again, looking confused. She begins looking around for
something small, feeling her ear occasionally. This is the state that MOLLY
finds her in when she returns, holding a legal-sized envelope.
MOLLY: Are you OK? Did you lose
something?
PENNY: My earring. (Pouty face.) Brandon gave them to me as
a going-away present and now one’s lost. I don’t know where it would have
fallen out.
MOLLY: Is Brandon your boyfriend?
PENNY: Oh, no. I’ve never had a
boyfriend. I limit guys to two dates with me or else the commitment level would
be way too high. His last date with me was right before I moved. He was totally
smitten with me, but I had no interest in him. (She looks under the couch) It’s nice for the gifts, though. (She finds the earring caught in her hair and
pulls it out.) I knew it couldn’t have gone far!
She exits to the bedroom. There’s a knock on
the door and MOLLY answers it. PHIL enters, holding a letter-sized envelope.
PHIL: (Awkwardly) Sorry to bother you, but I found this on the ground by
the mailbox. You must have dropped it. I mean, I guess it was you, since your
room number is on it and you’re holding mail… Yeah, anyway, here you go. (He turns to exit.)
MOLLY: Thank you. (Right before he leaves) What’s your
name?
PHIL: (Turns back around) Phil Duncan. Yours?
MOLLY: Molly Jacobs. Where are you
living?
PHIL: I’m right across the road,
building 8. And where—(He cuts off,
feeling foolish) Obviously you live here, since… yeah… I’m… I’m gonna go… I’ll
see you around, maybe?
MOLLY: (Smiling) I hope so. Thanks again, Phil. (He exits, shaking his head at himself. MOLLY looks at the letter he gave
her, then goes over to SHANEL’S bedroom door. She knocks.) Shay? Shay, you
have a letter. (No response) I’m
going to leave it outside the door, OK? (Still
no answer. She says to herself) OK… (She
sets the letter down and walks to the table. As she tries to open the
legal-sized envelope) Thank you, Molly, I’ll be right there. No problem,
just trying to help. Just trying to (she
tears it open) be a good roommate! (She
looks panicked for a moment then checks over her shoulder to make sure no one’s
listening. When she turns back around.) Be nice, Molly. Moving in is hard
for everyone, and everyone deals with it in their own way. (She starts filling out the papers that were
inside the envelope. There’s a knock on the door. She answers it and PHIL
enters.)
PHIL: Hi again. I just… I—(he sticks out his hand) I feel like I didn’t
do the introductions correctly. Can we try again? I’m Phil.
MOLLY: (Amused) I’m Molly. (They
shake hands.)
PHIL: Nice to meet you. Umm… what’s
your major?
MOLLY: English. How about you?
PHIL: I think Pre-Medical, but I’m
not sure.
MOLLY: That’s a lot of schooling.
PHIL: I know. That’s why I’m
having qualms. Where are you from?
MOLLY: Et—Wyoming. You?
PHIL: Florida. So, I guess you’re
already used to the cold.
MOLLY: Yeah, and I’m guessing you’re
going to freeze this winter.
PHIL: That’s what I’m thinking,
too. (Awkward pause) Well, it was
nice to meet you. I hope we get the chance to talk again. (Beat) Thanks for letting me try again. I’ll see you around, I hope.
MOLLY: Yeah, I think I’d like
that. (He turns to leave) Bye, Phil!
PHIL: (Turns back to her) Bye, Molly. (He
exits.)
PENNY: (Enters) Who was that?
MOLLY: A boy from across the
street.
PENNY: Oh?
MOLLY: Yeah. He’s nice, but kind
of awkward, like he doesn’t know how to talk to girls.
PENNY: Or maybe you just struck
him speechless.
MOLLY: Oh, he wasn’t speechless.
Just tongue-tied. As I said earlier, moving in is hard on everyone and everyone
copes in their own way.
PENNY: When did you say that?
MOLLY: (Self-conscious) Oh, I said it to myself I guess, huh…
PENNY: You do that, too? I’m so
glad I’m not the only one!
MOLLY: Oh my gosh, me too. I think
we’re going to be friends, Penny.
PENNY: I do, too. This is a good
way to start the semester.
MOLLY: It is for us at least.
She looks toward SHAY’s room. At that moment
SHAY opens her door, looks at PENNY and MOLLY, none of whom speak, then grabs
the letter and closes her door.
PENNY: Yeah, she may take some
work. (Beat) Are you going to the freshman
dance on campus tonight? It should be fun and there will be cute boys there.
MOLLY: Sure, if you’re going. I don’t
want to end up on my own. I’m not a huge fan of dances.
PENNY: It’ll be great. And don’t worry,
we’re friends now. I won’t leave you. I’m excited!
MOLLY: (Not sure) Yeah, sounds like it. Do you think Shay will be OK with
us leaving her alone all night?
PENNY: Are you kidding? She’ll be
thrilled. Come on, let’s go unpack, and then can I do your hair for the dance?
MOLLY: If you can get it to do
anything.
PENNY: I will. I have the magic
fingers. (They exit.)
